Story.

So after Donald Miller's talk as well as all the other great speakers at Jubilee, I've been thinking. I've been thinking alot. I've been struggling with this whole salt of the earth idea. I want to be the kind of salt that breaks things down or makes ground fertile. I don't want to just make things taste better. Most of the time salt is just a seasoning that covers up something that doesn't really taste that good at all.

Ok, allow me to elaborate. At Jubilee I learned something pretty profound that I kinda didn't know about before. Jesus calls us to be the salt of the earth. But not the table salt stuff. Actual, physical, big granual salt. Back in the day people used to gather the left over salt from the Dead Sea that washed up on the shore and used it to break down manure piles and to fertile dry, unproductive land. Salt brought life from death. How friggen' cool.


So back to me and my thinking.


I want to live an exciting story. I want to be life in a land of death. I want to glow in dense fog. I want to balance out my cushy life with someone who has no life at all. I run myself to exhaustion with all the stuff that I have to do that I need to stop and think that Jesus is here. And He wants me. And that is all the motivation I need to jump into a ....

time out. Jim just texted me. "can I tell you something?"
my reply... "always."
Jim's reply... "I think you'll understand. I wanna hold you hand."


that made me smile.


back to my thinking.


I want to dive into something that will make me lesser so that He becomes greater. I want to travel around the country with a big sign on my back that says street children in Guatemala are murdered everyday because no one is there to love them. I want to bring salt and love and friendship to the people who have no idea what that looks like. I want that story. I'm standing here in a knee length skirt, high heels and panty hose with a huge runner in the foot. I am so much more than this. I want out. I'm sick of working for a place that says "we love people" but the only reason they pretend to care so much is so they can charge over $200 a night on hotel accomodations. This ain't no salt. This is straight up cayan peppering people out of their own misery. And I want out.


I think I'm going to have a lot more to think about in the next few days.